Faithnyapara's Blog

love soul beautiful


V2There is a way I want to spend my valentine’s day.
I want to wake up at nine am, between silky sheets, snow-white pillows, and next to a warm body. I want to canoodule myself and snuggle into a tight embrace. I want to be kissed until my lips get full and my toes curl.

I want breakfast in bed. I want the smell of coffee to fill my room. I want it to be professionally brewed with a heart shaped barista art. I want grapes and melons cut into lovehearts. I want to feel their smoothness as I swallow. I want pink strawberry yogurt in long drink glass, with red cherries splashed on top.
I want a scented bubble bath. I want to soak myself in warm water sprinkled with rose petals. I want him, to kiss my delicate feet with love. I want him to wash my hair with a designer shampoo with a name I cannot pronounce.TULIPS

I want a bouquet of sweet-scented white roses mixed with white tulips. I want to have lunch with the finest china. I want forks and knives, placed in a Ritz-Carlton kind of arrangement. I want champagne flutes and expensive red French wine. I want a sunny humid afternoon, so I could rock my white shorts and sunglasses. I want to go swimming in crystal blue waters. I want hot sand to touch, really touch my feet.

I want a ride in a private helicopter just when dusk approaches. I want to see the city under me. I want to be on top of the world, close enough to touch the skies. I want a candle lit dinner. I want a Luis Vuitton gown, one that clings to my African hips and sweeps the floor despite my six-inch heels. I want to walk into the room and turn every eye. I want to make every woman green with envy. I want to not be invisible.

I want be driven home in a sleek black convertible with red interior. I want to show my red-bottomed heels when I get down. I want to be carried up the porch in strong arms. I want a chaste kiss on my forehead even as I insist he comes in. I want a promise of forever after.
I want soft music wafting in the cool night air. I want to watch the full moon through my bedroom window. I want the moon to illuminate my room walls. I want to fall asleep, sleep soundly, and not dream. I want…….I want my valentine wish. #Sigh.

Featured post

conquering the mountain

he was a young man,with dark curly silky hair with a perfectly snow-white complexion.he was tall,lean and his body well-built. he was wearing a green cap, white t-shirt and some baggy shorts with lots of pockets. he stood way far away from the rest of the pack, looking in, getting impatient. once in a while he would turn,look towards the bus, then he would nod his head turn right around and stare into nothingness. the rest would continue laughing, taking excess selfies,group photos and for minutes unending it looked like there was a small party going on.

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the guys: Njoro (left)Obed and ken(right) see them trying model poses

the groups quickly formed.  the girls only clique clearly overdressed for hiking complete with make up. they stood in circles giggling laughing and eating. and even against all advice they had their food-stocked bags faithfully on their the end, they were wiser than the rest of us. they were dressed to kill and you could feel small if your ego wasn’t to match. then there was the anxious fellas,people like me who wanted to prove a point. we were going to take down this mountain,literary if we had to.we were to afraid to say it loud though,so we were preparing psychologically, doing push-ups and jogs internally. we were going to show the rest of humanity what we were truly made of. steel and titanium.and of course there was that group that was made of all football fanatics. they were probably in it to prove that arsenal is better than Manchester, i know coz that was all they talked about, argued?debated? well it was one of those.

By the time the 3km hike started, the morning sun had lost its comforting warmth. it was large and ominous, glaring down at us, almost daring us. the clouds were quickly disappearing to the other end of the horizon.The wind was gentle though.armed with bottles of water we commenced. and we were the trend blazers.leading the way,others Njoro. team leader/motivational speaker/comedian/entrepreneur and a lot more as we discovered while we ascended. he gladly took the pacesetter role. he would go and the rest of us would practically try to keep up with him. then he would wait with us as we caught our breath,and in the meantime, he would take the opportunity to inspire motivate and keep our heads in focus. he talked like my high school coach,throwing in words like “we can do this,we will do this, we are conquerors and some other biblical stuff… i doubt he goes to church though,he would definitely make a good pastor.

the climb(notice me dead beat,i couldn’t stand)
ken at kilele ngamia(call him Big Bang)trying to do some superman

3km took us a good two hours to go through. i think it was Wangeci and i that dragged the men behind. by the time we were half-way,we were deadbeat.we had to be pushed and pulled up that terrain.going up was tricky,especially climbing the rocks. it wasn’t easy,not the way i thought it would be. we sang when we gave up.but we didn’t stop,not even when the top appeared to be further and further away. as noon approached the scorching heat of the sun almost killed us, the dust from the beat up terrain almost suffocated us. the water was running low. and then we started talking about pollution and forest conservation. you never miss the water till the well runs dry,we harshly found out.Now meet Ken. he hadn’t been nothing much as we started,he was rather too quiet.the kind of guy you would bully and feel guilty almost immediately.he was our designated camera man,he wouldn’t say much,just a very loaded joke that Njoro would take a century to understand. he spoke in sarcasm. only him understood exactly how the crater was formed. he tried to explain. we all zoned out at the big bang theory and i nick-named him big bang the rest of the hike. he would take Wangeci’s hand(very sweet puppish girl) and we watched first hand how this romance brewed..actually,there is nothing romantic like a mountain-inspired love. although am yet to fully figure out if it was love or knight in Armour saving damsel in distress.

apparently getting to the crater,as events turned out wasn’t such a big deal. even a bunch of 11 year old from some international school could do it. from the top we could see lake Naivasha, which Njoro called Bogoria..yeah,when you are 2545m above the sea level,geography can elude you too. the scenery was to die was something out of ‘Travel Diaries’. the light poured onto the lake making it glimmer.the trees below seemed to formed a the east of the crater was the peak,200 meters above where we stood.the ultimate challenge was to go round the 7.2 km circumference round the crater.

love brewing
this two…..

Njoro,Obed and I soon left the lovebirds alone.coz that mushy stuff aint easy to swallow,and it was hard to watch without a tear the time we got round the crater,it was sunset.we headed down the mountain,took a record of 30 minutes.yes 30!tired,dirty,hungry and thirsty,we went for any type of drink we could find.i sat in silence in the bus, stretched my legs on the seat,a newspaper in hand,i watched the suns yellow light fade.the others trickled in silently from the mountains. the strangers and the groups formed in the morning had disappeared. the mountain had brought some sort of unspoken unity. we ended the day with nyama choma in one of the butcheries in mai Mahiu.then we came back to the buzzing,bursting traffic confusion of the city.

when we were done we took a shoeFie
when we were done we took a shoeFie
Featured post

Steve Jobs, by Walter Isaacson

Mwania Mutungi

Among the many books that I have read, in this I have found a unique character. It is easy to underestimate the influence that Jobs has had in computing. He didn’t have the knowledge of making either computer software or hardware, and it isn’t easy to come into terms with the fact that he built Apple Computers Inc. relying on the technical expertise of the other people.

Followed his passion?

Giving a commencement address in Stanford university, he said that people ought to follow their passions, and make them their careers in life. One of the things he is famous for. It is very easy to take up this easily, owing to the fact that he was a successful person. But, what was he passionate about? Computers? Technology? Engineering? Rebellion? Perfection? Art? It happens that the last two were things that were close to his heart. For throughout his years…

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At the bottom of the bottle

I have a friend.  We have agreed he loves nothing else more than the way he loves his drink. Every friday is get wasted day. Its there, in his list of rituals, and its marked weekly in his calendar. And every week, he will drunk dial me and complain about his ex. Then he will cry, and every monday, he will have me swear on the bible, i wont talk about it to no man, not even Jesus…..

You have had a good day. have had a splendid day. You slayed that presentation at work. You heard your boss say you have a great future. You feel so confident about yourself. You are an overflow, a cornucopia of positivity and energy. You would run a marathon, you would even write a book. To top it all, the last Friday of the month is looming. Your bank account is bursting with all your hard earned money. Your life is perfect. Surely, it can’t get better than that. So you gather your Bros, coz you not a selfish man. You wanna share your blessings. You call them, one by one, each by name and you are like.
“Hey yo, my nigga my man, say we hit town…I lipia you a couple of rounds..”
You know they won’t say no. You feel the joy in their voices at the idea of free drinks and research of EPL games. You feel like a saint. You are a proud man. So you hit your usual joint. The bartender knows your namalcoholism ise. He likes you today. He forgives you for the wrangles you caused the last time you drank too much and went to overkill.  He fills your shots.  You make so much noise, the club comes to a standstill. You got the DJ attention. He just keeps unleashing your best tracks. Your buddies make the group look like a dance crew from stomp the yard. You know you are drank when you finally say… “Kila mtu apewe. Nalipa. I got money…” People shout like fans in a stadium. You notice your talent to be a politician. You blurt yourself into a speech. You say something about Obama. You call him ‘Cuzo’. You promise some dumb girl you will get her a lift in the beast. You scream how you will be young forever.
But the night can only be young for too long. Soon you staggering home. You crave for a bitter crisp frozen water. No you crave for a place to lay your head. You feel it there, something heavy at the base of your neck. You know you are gonna pass out. And you do. Right after you promised you wont drink again.

Ninja Movies

I have been almost mugged only twice in my life. The first time was by an amateur thief who followed me for over thirty minutes. I had made him out five minutes in. When he finally summoned his thief courage, I was well prepared. He came to me and I gave him a preaching of a lifetime, he almost gave his life to Christ. We actually parted on good terms and he promised he would polish his trade.

The second was not so pleasant. I was coming down Muindi Mbingu Street carrying my very new laptop bag. At that point, it was the most expensive thing I owned. Well, Hp Bags screams Hp Laptop so loudly. Any way this person presses a cold knife to my lower back and says. “Wachilia” I understood. Removing the bag from my back, I let him have it. To his shock, it was empty and light. So he looked at my scared frame and handed it back to me. He did not say anything. Just a cold stare, one that said, “You are killing me” and walked out. I went to my room and for a whole year never carried that damned bag anywhere.

I want to believe I am very good at personal defense. I know how to throw a punch. A kick. I have had enough of my fair share of catfights. Plus I have watched enough Ninja movies to understand how Ninjitsu works. But nothing really prepares you for a real Nairobi Mugging.

You have had a good day. No. You have had a splendid day. You slayed that presentation at work. You heard your boss say how much of a great future you have in the company. To top it all up, it is the last Friday of the month, and your bank is bursting forth with that salary waiting to be consumed. You feel so confident about yourself. You are a walking ball of energy. A cornucopia of all good things. Your life cannot get better than that. So you call your girls. Each by name and you are like…

“Hey, love. Long time. You down for girl time?” you know they cannot say no. So you hit town. You talk about life, and work and boys. (Coz eventually it always comes down to Boys). Maybe you give chunks of advice. Or you plainly cramp up in a tight hug and cry over ice cream. You feel so in touch with the world. And when the night stops being so young, you are craving for a warm blanket and solid place to lay your head. You have a bad feeling. Deep down in your stomach. You cannot explain why. So you ignore that feeling. You brave the midnight cold.

It is dark. But you are in a crowd. There is safety in Numbers? Right? Wrong! You know you are doomed when you find yourselves in the middle of a bunch of guys. There is a knife. Maybe two. You are not quite sure. They look built, stone faced, red eyes. They are probably stoned or intoxicated in some drug. Your first instinct is to flee. The road behind you is dark lit. The one before you, well, you can’t use that either. Someone gasps. Another screams, or maybe it’s you. There’s massive confusion. All you want to do is get away. But you don’t.

You always know when you are about to die. You feel it. It’s like a dark cloud hanging over your head. You become restless nervous, thoughtful of kinds of things. You look at your life critically. You wonder what you have been doing with your time. You think of crashes you should have pursued, of friendship you shouldn’t have destroyed. You think of your mama. You should go home more often. You think of money. You wonder how much is in your Mpesa. All kinds of thoughts go through your mind. All in a fraction of a second.
Let’s say you don’t die. You escape with just your life. And all those Ninja movies don’t really help you.

Mombasa- ish

“There are places in this world that are so full of history, it is impossible to grasp the full extent of secrets and treasures they hold”

What Obama’s visit really meant
A girl dreams. She dreams of palm trees, of coconuts’ oil massages, of blue drinks with little umbrellas. She dreams of white sands, and of gentle humid breeze, and light music and jazz and slow dances. She dreams of water that reflect the blue sky. It’s a need that needs to be satisfied. If not, she dies inside. Under the whole pressure of work schedules and bosses and unmet dreams, she will crumble. It’s important for her to travel, to explore to find out life beyond the city walls. She is constantly looking out for an escape. And when that opportunity comes in the name of a long weekend because the son of land finally comes home, she will abandon patriotism to quench her thirst for open seas. She will drop everything and gerrara there.
I wanted to go Mombasa. Yes I did. I mean I had to be convinced on why it is more worthwhile to go touring than to go shopping, but if we are to be candid here, deep inside I wanted to go down coast for me. It was my mark of maturity. Like a right of that said, I can do whatever I wanted. It was for closure. It was the cream on top of the cake I had earned. It was my vacation. Besides, every girl has to go down to south coast. (Am not sure why it is south though)You have to meet the beach boys who only say “Mrembo” and “kidocho” who will sweep you away in Swahili rhymes. It is important. It is paramount. It is in there in every girl bucket list.
Travelling is over-rated
When you are going to Mombasa there is only one-way to really travel… of course if you are not so big on the whole, jumbo jet and all… spend your twelve hours on the road. It is a test of patience; it is like watching a whole series of John Snow. Only good thing it ends well. Don’t you just hate it when everyone falls asleep? Like in few short minutes, the car is filled with frenzy, and people talking in crazy stupor. Out of nowhere, everything dies down, leaving only the sound of running engine. You listen to the crazy sound of silence. You are grateful for it maybe, because the subtle you doesn’t agree the crazy humor and the dancehall riddims. You try crazy staffs on your seatmate. Inserting ball pens into their bugs you that you are the only one not asleep. You are left to think about your life, your struggles and stuff. You think of all those people you didn’t call, and it makes you sad. Maybe you throw in a prayer, and then you laugh so hard at yourself. Nevertheless, you are grateful deep inside your soul. For the chance to enjoy the sunset. It’s a private moment almost divine. One spiritual moment between you and the lord. And you are glad the couple behind you is asleep. The beauty outside makes you think of Harry potter. I always think of Harry Potter when I see a good sunset. Crazy. The way the horizon turns to a light, dusky purple, with silver colored beneath the clouds is nothing short of Magic.
It’s really fantastic how the weather goes into constant changes. Almost Cruel even. You start with the cold chilliness of Nairobi. Y’all draped up in jumpers, and you probably looking to curl up to a warm body. The air becomes dry as you approach kitui and Machakos. It changes to some insane torrid heat as you approach Mombasa. You become uncomfortable. Fast. Suddenly, sweaters are removed, hallo vests and fans. Everyone starts asking for water, or frozen soda, which is hard to come by unless you were wise enough to carry a cooler. But let’s face it, with the hurry you left home, coolers were not on your mind.
I have my reservations about coast. The weather is one of them. The dress code is the second. I hate how it’s constantly chili in Nairobi, but heavens goodness! It is damn hot down in the coast. You practically don’t need to shower, coz it doesn’t make a difference. One minute out of the tub and you are right back where you started… sweating your pants off. I realized how overdressed I was. Advice. When you go to coast, don’t carry jeans, or slack pants… you look like one of those people who cannot let loose. I silently loathe these people. Like that guy who comes to the office with suits on Friday. Unless you working for the God damn stock exchange, that stuff isn’t acceptable. Don’t you just hate those tweeps… who make you feel and look not serious about your career.
“Love is a survival instinct.”
Mombasa is a picturesque, medieval town, weaving its ancient magic on a vast majority of its people. It is surrounded by a spectacular and enchanting landscape. The town itself, a cornucopia of artists’ studios, galleries and wonderful antiques shops, is a magnet for tourists from all over the world. The warm air feels amazing. It’s a vacation all right, and that amount of sun is good for the skin. Black or white people. I love museums. There is something about historical buildings. Something wildly attractive, that makes you feel like you are bigger than life. Like there is more to the story of humanity. So when I stopped playing third wheel to all the love that was happening at the beach, I took my exploring soul to a painting tent. A young girl, crippled at a young age with polio, but I have never seen such spectacular works on canvas. I stood there for two whole hours, and listened to her explain in flawless Swahili her drawings. I was in so much awe all I wanted to do was be alone.
Now personally when I think of vows of obedience and loyalty, I don’t exactly think of traditional get together and kitenges. I am more inclined to glass slippers and long sermons. In fact, the two are sort of like oil and water. But one thing I agree. Don’t travel to coast has a tendency to make you feel more alone than you are. And if by a chance you do, don’t book a king size bed in an overpriced five star resort. The glamour will get to you, and you will feel so confident but the large rooms and scented showers will without a doubt l deprive you of peace. You will sleep like a kitten the first day, because well the 12 hours of travel leaves your body with a need to lie down. But I assure you, the next night and the days to come, loneliness will hit you so bad you will be wanting to be in your futon in your home with your loud annoying neighbors.

When darkness fell, we ordered pizzas (coz we are Nairobians and fast foods are our curse) we sat at the beach illuminated by garden lights on the other side of the resort. We told stories, we played taboos, and charades and finally had sand fights. Then we tried to dance Chakacha. I said try coz that is all we did. Our body make up doesn’t allow us to shake much. Besides we are more accustomed to party music. We made so much noise, the management was concerned. We went to rest at 2.00 am.  And we packed our suitcases and came back home, where the laptops are.

That Story

(For a writer I once knew, and a teacher I couldnt stand.)
A lot of things scare me, but this one thing scares me most. That one day words will fail me. See am a talker. My mother can attest. There are stories,quietly being whispered around. Every guest who walks into my mother’s house is delightedly regaled these so-called ‘chronicles of Tshiko’. Rumors have it that I used to ask so many questions, my grandfather called me and I quote ‘wacha kihehere Kasuku’. I talked about everything and questioned everyone. My teachers loved me for it, my classmates silently loathed me. And for my grandmother…. Well it was something like
Me: shosho si uko na kwako?
Grandma: mmmh
Me: Mbona unawacha kwako unakuja kukula kwetu?
I saw the end of a caning stick that day and started what became a serious conflict between mother and mother in law. So when it became apparent that I can’t just say whatever I wished, I decided I was going to be a judge when I grow up so I can talk to people, without anyone shutting me down. My mother agreed with this dream. And oh! she made me read! Something about being a ‘learned friend’ and all. I Read the dictionary, read the newspaper read parents magazine… if it was printed it was readable. This was my first addiction. Now I can’t sleep without placing a book under my pillow. That feeling I get, comforts me. The scent of paper when you turn a page, or just watching the paper yellowing and dog-eared corners. That there comforts me. Creepy? Well let us agree the world needs weirdoes like me.
I read Aminata and Oganda in “The rain came”. Tales of strong women! They taught me courage and sacrifice. So creatively crafted, I knew that day I wanted to be a writer. My mother’s heart was crushed. However, once in a long while, she would read my compositions to her class. Then she would mark them and once she wrote ‘nincompoop’ as a comment. I did not know what in hell that meant. I wrote, till now I don’t know how to stop. So yes, the idea that one day, I will breathe no more, and I will not have anything to say about it shakes the wind out of my system. Words mean control. They mean that am actively engaged in my mind with the environment around me. It means am god. That in the confines of my brain I can be a character in people’s stories and even better, I can see and design those stories to whatever I damn well please.

Mombasa in Pictures…

DSC09492  we wait for the Bus till 12, after I woke up at 4.00 am to pack!!! So we have Lunch in the Bus!!! A comrade never travels hungry aye!!DSC09499

Then we threaten to strike if the driver—-(This guy) does not start movingDSC09735 and DSC09517then we got a Puncture and we went to picture moods.DSC09732A stopover for overpriced meat and Biriani. Then sleep…oh sweet slumber with the engine roving in the background.DSC09726

breakfast…DSC09697 academics #buildings #construction Site Visits  but again most of us were hardly listening.DSC09556 We could hardly wait to hit the BeachDSC09529But first….Fort Jesus… fun fact:The architecture of the fort represents the rough outline of a person lying on their back, with the head towards the sea… Meet our tour guide. A scary fellow,he knew his history well thoughDSC09624 see me laughing at the way those Portuguese died… sad!!

DSC09665then of nature trails and walks in Bamburi Haller park..DSC09673and I caught these guysDSC09674 on


when we finally hit the beach, all my roomie wanted was  a full cup of porridge!!DSC09710 I disowned her that day….and I met this 14 year old selling ornaments.DSC09739 we agreed on 1 anklet for a picture..DSC09690 then we came home, where the heart and laptop is.

A book for every crisis of my life

Kenyan Feminist

books animation

Every time I take a new book to read, I hope that it will be one that will engage my senses and emotions, consume my thoughts and heart away, and make it extremely difficult to put it down. Unfortunately, that doesn’t happen to me that often. I have read many good books, but they often fail to grip me or rip me apart the way I expect, want or need them too.

In a desperate attempt to find that book, I have been asking myself, what kind of book will it take to give me this kind experience? I have experienced it, and I want to experience it again and again. So, I began to explore, what the books that had this effect on me, have in common, and I noticed a rather interesting pattern; each one, speaking to an identity crisis.

The first time a book totally consumed me…

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Memories Made On Valentines

amazing pictures done by the best of photographers


On a warm Saturday evening at the A.D.D garden of University of Nairobi, Halisee organized a teaser Valentines photo shoot for an event known as The Rendition. Acclaimed for crafting unforgettable entertainment experiences as well as availing a platform for emerging performing and visual artists, The Rendition is where Kim and I began offering our photography services as a team. We covered the event every first Friday of the month and this time we tried something different- a promo shoot.

Our models that evening were the beautiful Kendi and the talented finger-style guitarist, Sly, better known as Acouslyk. To those who know him well, he treats his guitar as if it were his girlfriend. I wonder whether it was jealous of the chemistry he had with Kendi. Love does not envy 🙂

We set out to create a simple yet extraordinary date for the two “lovebirds”. Acouslyk serenaded…

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